Blog Post

Seeing through the Fog

Photo by Dan Magatti on Upsplash

This last year has been something else, hasn’t it?

I have always thought of myself as an introvert.
If given the choice, I will stay home rather than venture out, most of the time.
But with everything that’s going on around us this year, I found myself closing off and shutting down. Instead of the lack of socializing energizing me, it did the opposite and made me depressed.
I pulled away from friends, social media, and even my writing.

The funny thing is, writing normally draws me out of the dumps and getting me going, but even though I knew it would help, I chose to engage in other activities instead of focusing on my writing. 
I thought daily of jumping back into it, after all, I am on the final stage of getting my book finally published, but even that didn’t prod me into writing. Honestly, I didn’t feel like writing this now… I ran from it, in fact.

Okay, the feeling is starting to peek it’s head out, as I am writing this.
I’m beginning to see through the fog.

I’m going to make a confession, I could have writing the above paragraph and easily replaced the word “writing” with the word “praying.”That’s a hard thing to admit, but there it is… out there for all to read and maybe judge.
For years I’ve seen a connection between my writing and my prayer time. When I pray, I can write, when I don’t, my writing suffers.  Let me clarify something, My faith has never wavered, I have still prayed as I went through the day. The habit of whispering “one-liners” has been a habit for years, but the real prayer… the deep prayer… that I have let slide. 
It’s become clear again that my writing is a gift from God and being such, I am obligated to write. I need to be using this gift that God has given me.

Your talent is God’s gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God.
~ Leo Buscaglia

This last two weeks we, (my hubby and I) were able to take an extended vacation. Even in this time of COVID, we packed up and headed to an AirBnB that we have had booked since last year. I didn’t know how much I needed this trip. I needed to get away and just chillax. (yes, we followed all the COVID laws, kept social distancing, and wore masks.)
We walked the beach, took long hikes, snuggled up to watch TV and movies late into the night, then sleep in until we wanted to get up.
This was also a time of filling up, on God’s love and grace.
What a wonderful time!

Even with all that, I still had to force myself to begin writing again. This is the result.  It’s short and not that exciting, But now that I’ve started writing, the urge to write more is returning. 

I will use the gift God has given me.

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